Friday, November 27, 2009

Reconnecting

It has been over thirty years since I have seen or talked to a very dear friend of mine. This week, thanks to Face Book, we have been given another opportunity to reconnect. The joy in my heart is like a deep well. The sadness, that same well.
My dear friend is ill. I do not know how ill. My intuition tells me: VERY ill. I do not have her phone number, she asked me for my e-mail address with the promise she would get back to me right away. So, I wait. My heart knows no difference of the years that have come between us. Time has brought us together again.

I felt an impending sense of expressing all of what she has meant to me. Yet my words felt so trite. Time has brought my friend and I together again, both of us joining Face Book about 2 months ago. I miss my friend. This makes me want to let those I love know even more, and without a moments hesitation:

I love you with all that I am. My words are meaningless. Please listen to my heart. Look into my eyes. Forgive my ignorance, when I didn't listen. It wasn't for lack of loving you. You have meant more to me and made my life better, even when we fought. I raged. You helped me grow. Your kindness I sometimes took for granted. I can't re- wind that one. My heart loves you even more for loving me- through all of my humanity.

You are priceless. I can promise you this. From the love you have filled me with unselfishly my friend, when your time comes, you will not be alone. Wherever you are I will find you. I will hold you through your long winter night until you take your last breath on Earth.

Because, you are my friend.

4 comments:

  1. this is beautiful and moving, clare! a wonderful homage to friendship and taking the opportunity to express our love/what is in our hearts. in my life - i have missed many an opp, but that is changing... ever so slowly.

    i'm sorry that your friend is ill.

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  2. Petunia, thank you for your wonderful soothing words. This one that I wrote, I realized I will never be able to write again. It was so difficult. It took so much out of me. The next stage is living it fully. I know what you mean about missed opps. I am changing, too. I won't make that mistake again with you -Petunia. I love you, Clare

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  3. Hi, I guess you haven't heard from her yet. . . when the time is right, you will. . . somehow. I enjoyed reading your blogs. . . your writing is growing and so are you. Happy Day my friend. V.

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  4. Thanks,V. Thanks for your words of encouragement. I am tracking her down. We keep missing each other. I have had an excellent teacher to help me grow. I watch my teacher and I become stronger from her courage and fortitude. I love you V. Clare

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