The Importance of Skinned Knees

I did not like to fall down as a child,  It felt very unnatural and upsetting  to me. I felt as though I was doing something wrong, going against nature. Having a  prankster friend in grade school, who was  athletically inclined, I liked it even less.  I was the kid who would  be the one to fall into the huge puddle of rain everyone  else jumped over. I  did not have the confidence or grace nor athletic ability  and foresight to know what was too big for me to maneuver comfortably.   My friend was a gymnast who knew her body very well, and was very comfortable with it. This gave the prankster great pleasure  time after time finding situations to test me.

Needless to say, I did not do well and did not get the joke. I was the joke, but  did not see it coming due to her quick wit. We would play in her back yard and climb a tree, which I did  with much resistance.
She was literally like a monkey climbing up in seconds. It took some doing to get me up, but finally I was up. After a little while she said she was going to get us some snacks.  Being the chubby little food head that I was, it was sounding pretty  good for all that climbing effort. I was looking around at the view from above.... no doubt just spacing out. Time passed and no friend. "Hmmm, what 's up with that, " my hungry little mind wondered.  Then I looked in her house through the  glass door and saw her pealing with laughter. I knew what was up with that- I was. I was up the tree too far for comfort to come down,
I was scared. Finally what seemed an eternity her mother came out  and yelled at her to get the ladder.
Game over....

Having grown up with a father who played it so safe, stayed on the sidelines of life..... we were not  taught how to skin our knees. Everything would get us hurt. To the point of paranoia, if you  do this, such and such  will happen. I still rode my bike like the wind~ that was my only refuge. I am sure I rode  recklessly, hands free, at night, whatever I could to break free from the constraints of his fear and rules. Of course as a girl I could not understand any of this, I just felt it. My father fell off a bike as an adult and broke his arm and that was that.... his daredevil days of danger over. Life is too dangerous.
People who have swimming pools : Someone will climb your wall into the pool and you will find them drowned in it. Now this paranoia  was not  exclusive to my father. My mother would tell me as a child ( in her own bizarre way I am sure to keep me safe)  Be careful in  public bathrooms: A little girl got murdered in there and cut up and put in the toilet. Relaxing tidbit to hear....  Or another one was sharks  could come up through the toilet  from the ocean? From where I wonder. So imagine me as a child trying to go to any bathroom, thinking such relaxing thoughts of sharks and murder while doing my thing.

 The importance  of being able to learn to fall down and skin my knees is even more important than ever. I never learned how. I was careful, that's how we were taught. Always inside me there was a risk taking fun loving gal.... who  I have allowed to come out  with each passing year.
I have challenged myself with so many things and actually learned I am quite the fierce competitor.
With confidence, learning to trust myself, my abilities,  I push myself and like to see what I am made of.
"People with swing sets break their arms."  All these myths from two frightened people who came together and were given the title PARENT.  The thing was- I  already faced down my worst fears at three when I almost died from pneumonia. I knew what it already looked like, and knew it alone.
These fears, phobias became so confusing to me, I  felt I did not know my own mind.

We all have to fall down and skin our knees. We cannot grow, move forward to the next stage of life without it. You cannot bypass this part of life. I am now seeing my stunted growth in certain areas from not enough skinned knees. I wanted to do it right, stay in the lines. I pulled back.... stayed out of life if I was not doing it right. Moved on quickly so as not to be exposed for my weaknesses. I did not realize the endearing quality of vulnerability. In others.... definitely, never myself.

I am falling down left and right. My knees are skinned and banged up. I will fly in a biplane in a few months with our daredevil pilot friend. He will treat me with kid gloves.  This I know- I trust him. I will not need a ladder to come down from this one.  Here's to the year of skinned knees.